Online Learning - Dr. Bruce A. Johnson

How to Respond to Disrespectful Students With Care

What do you expect of your students, as to an expectation of respect for you and your position as their instructor?

From my experience, whenever you teach a class with adult students, there is an expectation these students will maintain a basic level of respect for you as their instructor. It’s a mutual process, with the instructor reciprocating back to their students that same basic level of respect. I’ve not had to think about this topic until recently, when I’ve observed a trend with many online students no longer holding respect for their instructors.

What I’m noticing is some online students feeling empowered to speak in any manner they see fit, without regard for the school’s Student Code of Conduct. Worse yet, a student who speaks with a lack of respect can also become a class disruptor, and before long, their attitude begins to show up among others in the class. We are all humans, and when you are trying to teach from a perspective of care and concern, or true appreciation for your students, it can feel unpleasant when a student is being negative and aggressive.

If this is happening to you, especially within your online classes, there are strategies I recommend you consider using. While it may not be possible to stem the tide of what is happening from a larger or societal perspective, perhaps what I recommend will help you to find a way of allowing you to continue to demonstrate appreciation for your students. Since disrespect is a negative disposition that can spread throughout the class, a set of proactive strategies is needed to address it head-on. This will help avoid reactively responding in an emotional manner.

How Disrespect Infects an Entire Class

Throughout my career teaching online classes, I’ve had an occasional student demonstrate disrespect, and it typically was a one-time incident. For example, it may have been related to a grade a student believed was unfair or unjustified, and the student sent a message using inappropriate words. However, I’m noticing something more than just an occasional message, I’m observing the rise of a class disruptor. This is a student who takes their disagreement to an entirely new level.

A student as disruptor may form a group outside of the class for other students to join, and then share their negativity with the group. It isn’t long until I’m noticing a similar disrespectful attitude from other students in the class. In other words, this disruptor spreads negativity and it catches on like wildfire. I’m not talking about a general negative attitude either. These are outright acts of disrespect, from challenging statements made on a discussion board, to disrespectful messages sent directly to me.

An Issue of Generational Differences

I’ve been teaching online for over 18 years, and back when I began, it seemed as if students held a different attitude towards their instructors. I was also an online student at the time I began teaching in this environment. It was the early 2000s, and it seemed as if there was an automatic level of respect given by students, not only for the work they were producing in class, but also for their instructors. When I was enrolled in my doctoral program, I witnessed the highest level of respect given by students, including myself, towards instructors and the work being developed and submitted.

I was raised in a generation that valued hard work and absolute respect for those in authority. The fact my father was a police officer also influenced my outlook and work ethic. I would never think of being disrespectful to anyone. This may also be a quality of a Baby Boomer, which is the category I belong in. I’ve read a number of research studies that point to certain newer generations as having an attitude of entitlement, or being difficult to work with in general, yet I find it hard to imagine how respect would not be a fundamental aspect of a person’s make-up or set of characteristics. But I’ve observed it does at times, and that is why it must be addressed as an online teaching strategy or set of strategies.

Strategies to Help You Respond to Disrespectful Students

There are some forms of disrespect which you must address quickly and with procedures established by your school. However, the type of disrespect the following strategies are designed for involve the ongoing challenges that make it difficult for you to remain positive. For example, I had a student who sent messages with an abrasive tone, simply because they received two points deducted from their assignment. It wasn’t easy at times, yet I did my best to continue to show this student I cared about them and appreciated their efforts. Perhaps these strategies will help you as well.

Strategy 1: Adjust Your Mindset for Appreciation

Whenever I have a student who uses abrasive language, or an improper tone, I first have to determine if it has crossed a line and must be reported. If not, I then have to center myself and use my own emotional intelligence skills to monitor how I’m feeling. I have to make certain my mindset is well-adjusted before I respond. I had to stop, breathe, and remind myself of my core beliefs, which is to help students learn and grow. To do this, I must always be appreciative of their efforts, regardless of how they behave in class. I want to address their performance, not behaviors.

Strategy 2: Appreciation Comes from the Inside Out

I am someone who can tolerate a lot from students, and over the course of 18+ years I have tolerated a lot of strong wording from students. Yet this new form of student as disruptor, and someone who comes right up to the line of what is not acceptable, is really quite stressful. In fact, I find when many in a class begin to act like this, it can feel overwhelming at times. I have to really be aware of how I am feeling and if I become too personally affected by the stress of the class, I need to provide myself with some downtime, even it is a matter of a few hours. That break away from the online class can help free my mind and give me a renewed perspective. I can then go back to feeling appreciation for my students, knowing it comes from the inside out.

Strategy 3: Remember to Appreciate and Respect Your Role

Now this may seem to be counterintuitive for demonstrating appreciation; however, this strategy is about showing appreciation for your work and care for your position. If you have a disrespectful student, or more than one, be certain your communication is done through proper channels. For example, if you are expected to communicate through the classroom messaging system, do so to make certain there is a record.

If a student would like a phone call with you, and this has been an ongoing problematic student, then offer something such as Zoom, so you can record the conversation. You may not need the documentation; however, it is better to have it than be put in a situation where words are disputed. This strategy is not meant to inhibit how you work with your students, but rather ensure you have properly worked with them. Appreciation is necessary for you and your students.

Strategy 4: Establish Expectations and Show Appreciation When Met

Remember you can always tolerate students and their behavior, but communicate your expectations. The Course Syllabus typically has a statement about the Student Code of Conduct, which you can refer to when or if needed. I know many instructors like to remain popular and more importantly, they are afraid to make their students mad, simply because of the potential for negative end-of-course evaluation scores and commentary.

Yet you have to remember that disrespect will likely escalate if you do not address it. What I recommend is you establish your expectations at the start of the class, and show appreciation to students when they have met them. Any time you can demonstrate appreciation for something students have done, be it a milestone, goal, or adherence to what you expect, it helps build positive emotional feelings within them.

Strategy 5: Evaluate Situations to Demonstrate Care and Concern

There is always something to be learned after you have addressed a student who has demonstrated disrespect. For example, what was at the heart of the student’s frustration or cause for concern? From my perspective, most instances occur because of grades and points not earned.

What I have learned over time is the importance of weekly instructional videos, conducting webinars, providing video feedback, and reviewing the grading rubrics included with the learning activities. In other words, I’ll try to proactively address the areas which are most likely to cause upset for students. My goal is to demonstrate care and concern for the entire class, and offer guidance to help them succeed.

Remember: You are Human

Any time you experience disrespect it can feel personal, as it seems like an attack, on you, your credibility, authority, subject matter expertise, and/or professional experience. What I want for you to remember is that you are human. If you find yourself in a situation in which you feel a sense of ugliness or mean spiritedness, take a break. Walk away from the laptop or computer, and find a space to regroup. Perhaps you can walk outside, speak with a family member, call a colleague, or do anything but go back into that environment. You need to do something that will distract you long enough to let your emotions settle down. Then your rational mind can begin to help address your feelings, and you can develop a plan for what to do next. What you don’t want to do is react in anger or while you are feeling negative. Show your students you appreciate them no matter what they have done, and care for them during the best and worst of times. As a result, you’ll feel good about yourself, and the work you dedicate so much time and effort to complete.

About Dr. Johnson

Dr. Bruce A. Johnson has 35 years of experience teaching and training adults. The first half of his career was spent in the field of Corporate Training and Development, with his last role as Manager of Training and Development.

Then in 2005, he made a transition into the field of distance learning. Over the past 18 years, he has been an online instructor, Faculty Development Specialist, Faculty Director, Faculty Development Manager, and Dissertation Chair.

Dr. Johnson is also an inspirational author, writer, and educator. His life mission is to teach, mentor, write, and inspire others. He has earned a PhD in Postsecondary and Adult Education, a Certificate in Training and Performance Improvement (TPI), a Master’s in Adult Education, and a Master of Business Administration (MBA).

As a scholar practitioner, Dr. J was published in a scholarly journal, and he has been a featured presenter at an international distance learning conference, along with presenting at three faculty conferences. He has also published over 230 online articles about adult learning, higher education, distance learning, online teaching, and mindset development. Dr. J published three books related to higher education, including two about online teaching.

Getting Down to Business: A Handbook for Faculty Who Teach Business.

Transform Adult Education: Expert Teaching Strategies for Educators.

Transform Online Teaching: Expert Strategies and Essential Resources Every Educator Needs.

Come join Dr. J’s new group, Motivation for Transformation:

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November 11, 2021/by Dr. Bruce A. Johnson

Encourage a Sense of Hope to Help Students Succeed

Online Learning, Adult Education, Appreciative Teaching, Higher Education

Do you ever feel so completely overwhelmed by the external circumstances around you it seems almost impossible to remain calm and steady when you need to be present in the classroom? As an educator, you have to somehow separate yourself from the emotional reactions you may be experiencing, if you want to have a clear mind and remain focused on your students. But this isn’t always easy to do, especially if you continue to pay attention to the news and social media. It can leave you feeling emotionally drained.

Yet consider your students and what they expect of you as their instructor. You are expected to be focused on their needs and ready to guide them through the learning process. Instructors are really not “cut some slack” for feeling overwhelmed and having a less than perfect day. When you are involved in your instructional role, and supposed to be focused on the developmental needs of your students, there is no downtime provided. This means you either must be plugged in mentally, and fully available to provide quality instruction, or you need to ask someone for help.

Why is all of this so important? If all of these circumstances are so challenging for you as an instructor, consider how even more challenging it must be as a student. I’m an online instructor and my students are typically the non-traditional learners, who are working full-time while also attending school. They are not only balancing work-related issues, most are also addressing pandemic-related issues, which may include financial challenges, home schooling, remote work, and the list continues. These students are feeling the impact of significant stress, while also attending school.

As an instructor, you must set aside the events of the day and focus intently on your students. If your students needed your attention before, and assistance to be able to persist, they need it now more than ever. In fact, many students need to feel a sense of hope, in order to continue on in their academic program. There are many students who are internalizing negative reactions they experience, and absorbing negative emotions from those around them, and the result is a feeling their hard work may or may not pay off in the end. Your encouragement, while they work, is vital to their success.

It’s as Simple as: I’m Here to Help

The first key to the establishment of a relationship with your students is availability. It is being responsive and demonstrating your appreciation for their effort, contribution, and attempt. Even if they may a mistake or get everything wrong with a written assignment, there was an attempt. The point is they showed up to class and they were present. You must also mirror that presence with your willingness to be available and ready to assist them. That readiness can be developed in multiple methods. Just be certain your students know it will be consistent from week to week.

I’m “old fashioned” in that I offer Office Hours during the week, which includes daytime and evening hours. I also offer Office Hours on Saturday, which I understand seems out of the ordinary and a significant investment of my time; however, we live right now in extraordinary times. If I can assist and resolve a student’s concern with five minutes of my time, it is time well spent. When I began teaching online over 15 years ago, the institution I worked for required weekly Office Hours and it was instilled within me, as to the value and benefit it could offer to students. I’ve never forgotten it and even know what it was like from the perspective of being an online student, when instructors I had offered it.

What can also be transformative is your disposition towards your students. When you are in the classroom, engaging with learners via email or classroom messaging, be careful about the words you use. A simple statement in reply to a classroom message or email, such as “I’m here to help”, can change the disposition of a struggling student. I also include this statement any time I provide feedback, whether it is formal feedback for grading, or informal feedback to help guide and coach a student. Those words let the student know I am a resource and available for them.

Give Students a Reason to Feel Hope

If you are teaching online, it will not be easy at first to determine if your students are adapting well to the class, or if they are facing challenges related to the current external environment. As the class progresses, you may receive emails or messages which inform you of their status and challenges. The most difficult aspect of teaching online now is observing students who struggle and not knowing if it due to a lack of academic skills, motivation, stressors, pandemic-related issues, or any other number of reasons. During a “normal” or pre-pandemic time, you could provide resources related to the specific academic problem. But now there may be a number of factors interfering with the student’s progress.

This is when your relationship with students becomes even more important. In addition to availability, and the use of reassuring words, students will benefit from something beyond the scope of your instructional practice. This is the development of a mindset of hope. It doesn’t mean hope of a better life, career, or future, which is beyond the scope of the class. It is the hope their effort and time dedicated to classwork will mean something in the long term. If they feel hope, and they persist, then completion of a course will lead to completion of another. Eventually they will complete their degree and well on the way to completion of their goals.

How do you nurture a sense of hope in your students? You can implement at least one or more of the following strategies within your instructional practice to accomplish this goal.

Happiness as a Disposition: Students develop a sense for how you are feeling, whether you teach on-ground or online. This is reflected in the tone of your posts, messages, and emails, simply by the word choice used. My recommendation is that you make happiness a choice, every day you decide to interact with students. You can be happy regardless of circumstances around you, and maintain an authentic happiness, simply because you are able to teach. I look forward to interacting with my students, even when I am feeling the most challenged, and during the pandemic I was challenged. But I was determined to still maintain authentic happiness and you can too, just by the power of your intention.

Optimism as a Point of View: If you are going to help students feel a sense of hope while they work, then somehow you must also hold a point of view that is optimistic. This may go against every personal belief you hold, and yet, as an educator you need a different perspective during your instructional interactions. This is a time to promote a sense of what may come or what is yet to be, otherwise, why should students continue to work on their degree program? Keeping your beliefs out of the classroom and remaining neutral can be challenging, but this is needed if you want to enter into intellectual discourse with students. You need an objective lens from which to frame your discussions, based upon research and data, rather than bias and subjective opinions.

Positivity to Bring About Change: While happiness is a disposition, positivity is a specific strategy to be implemented within communication, posts, and feedback. There is quite a difference between a response that begins with “Student” versus “Hello Student”. A positive approach is one in which you, as the instructor, are viewed as approachable and easy to interact with, rather than someone who is to be feared and avoided. When students feel comfortable interacting with you, from the perspective of being able to send you a message or contact you, then you are presented with an opportunity to bring about change. This is when you can learn more about their background and the unique challenges they may be facing. I’ve heard of many who were facing pandemic-related challenges, which allowed me to work with them.

Encouragement to Develop Success: There is one aspect of teaching that I always believe in, regardless of societal conditions, and it is the use of encouragement. Whether I acknowledge a student for making an attempt or an effort, there always needs to be some form of encouragement within feedback provided. I know all too well, especially having been an online learner and not physically present to interact with my instructors, how it feels to receive cut and paste commentary that offers nothing more than rote statements. But a few words that seek to uplift can make all the difference in the next attempt made, and the decision as to whether or not the student will utilize the feedback provided. It all becomes a matter of building up the student’s confidence so they are able to become successful.

You are a Beacon of Hope

This is a challenging time for you and your students. I do not want to minimize the potential for stress that you, as an educator, are likely to experience. My intent with this post is to bring awareness to the potential influence you have on students, along with the ability you have to help them during a time when they need your guidance the most. Somehow, you need to be able to manage the stress and emotions you are experiencing, well enough that you can become a source of inspiration and hope for your students. They may or may not look up to you now, but they do expect you to be available to help them, especially when they become frustrated.

A positive disposition can become quite challenging to maintain at times, especially given how long the pandemic has been going on. Yet if you can shine a beacon of happiness, optimism, positivity, and encouragement, you will help to create a sense of hope for students, especially those who are struggling to stay engaged and motivated. I’ve found this can become transformative not only for my students, but for myself as well. As I see my students feel uplifted, and develop a sense of accomplishment or improvement in their disposition, I too feel better empowered to manage the stress of my day. Even if you only help encourage one of the most discouraged students this week, this sense of hope you’ve helped to instill within them will lead them to success in your class and beyond.